👖 the sexiest (hottest! coolest!) clothing cops of the non-blue life variety that got us through 2022! 👖
2022 EOTY WRAP-UP: we talkin' PANTS, we talkin' SHIRTS, we talkin' BAGS, we talkin' SILLY WATCHES.
Why wouldn’t we publish end-of-the-year content? Do you think we’re above that?
Emilio and I (Kevin aka Glizzy Obama) have decided to write about the clothing that has brought us joy this year, from the new new to the things we’ve been had. The garments that got us through 2022 and have seen some shit, from the pristine and battered, used and virgin, etc. and etc. - Kevin
Editor’s note: Kevin has decided to refer to himself as Glizzy Obama. Sorry.
Gramicci loose tapered pant
Doc, you gotta help me. No matter how hard I try, I can’t shut the fuck up about these pants.
Gramicci’s Loose Tapered Pant is, once again, my go-to, favorite, bestest pair I own. These babies got a.) the short inseam b.) the built-in adjustable belt so you never have to wear your own (For the record: belts suck, you should never need one.) c.) very cool dye(s) d.) TONS of room around the hips and thighs for a wide top e.) a slight taper at the knees and hem f.) good good pockets.
The way the hem drapes over my shoes with that slight break gets me pumped enough to do something cheeky like rob a bank. Not having to lift these up from slippage every five feet of walking is another plus. I wear em’ to work, hikes, dog walks, at home. They match everything, they look good, and put me in a great mood. They’re just the fucking best. The “greige” pair has served me since 2018, and I’ve been rotating a “grey” pair since 2020. I plan on buying three more before my life is over. — Kevin
andafterthat Inland Empire “FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION” hat
Kevin has previously discussed the proliferation of graphic tees and people printing graphics on shirts-masquerading-as clothing brands. One could say andafterthat is just one of the cool kids (i.e. acceptable brands) in a sea of fish who somehow have $200 to spend on buying Instagram followers but his work feels real on a level most aspiring new brands don’t.
Graphic tees are often billboards, fabric advertisements where both the maker and buyer want to signal, “Hey, I’m cool, and this shirt is just to reaffirm that I am, in fact, cool.” (No offense to anybody making Pen & Pixel-style “vintage rap” shirts.) A hat with a giant cow and LAURA DERN stamped on its crown isn’t an advertisement. It’s just a hat, but in the same way a middle class suburban dad has a TaylorMade or Callaway hat. - Emilio
RoToTo socks + beanies
Never have I ever spent over $20 on a single pair of socks or $40 on a beanie. Pulled the trigger on these organic cotton waffle crew socks, and buddy, these are some nice essential garbs. I’ve been on the hunt for a slouchy pair of socks that droop at my ankles and, unlike those shitty Hanes pairs you got when you were a young pal, don’t require constant pulling up. These are those.
Rototo makes its socks using traditional old-school knitting techniques over computer-manufactured trash, so that waffle texture has a high-quality feel. They’re thick and cozy and feel like premium socks that’ve been worn to shit straight out the bag, which is exactly what I need right now. Organic cotton is also always a plus.
Weirdly though, the company’s beanies are only made with 5% real stuff (wool) and 95% synthetics (nylon, acrylic), which I thought I’d hate, but they’re bangers too. I’ve got a big dome and this guy stretches out pretty well over it. Synthetics have their purpose, of course, so yeah, it’s also warm. It’ll serve me all winter, that’s for sure. — Kevin
Simple Shoes’ Original Clog in “Pony Hair”
In my journey down the clog and mule rabbit hole, I stumbled upon Simple, who I think have nailed the gardener and/or hiker aesthetic for people who don’t garden or go on hikes. Their Original Clog, which is usually offered in suede or leather, is a welcome alternative to the cool-but-seen-too-many-times options of Birkenstock and Crocs. Early in the fall, they upgraded their clog, transforming it from the glue of a fit to the whole crux.
The modest yet eye-grabbing spotted pattern, the subtle yet pronounced texture from the upper, the lightweight yet structured walking experience. Simple’s pony hair clogs are a fashionable needle in a haystack, an animal print lovers’ dream. As gaudy late 90s/early 00s fashion slowly cycles back into chic, these babies don’t even bother toeing the line of ugly or ironic. These slap, no ifs, ands, or buts. - Emilio
Battenwear crew lodge sweater
Perfect sizing exists. Battenwear’s Lodge Crewneck is boxy as hell, lightweight, and made with soft, short pile fleece that doesn’t feel like one of those cheap blankets your parents gift you from Marshall’s or Target every holiday season. Love the wide neck on this and the side seam pockets are :verynice: - Kevin
Vinny’s Richie Penny Loafer
Before this year, I only owned one pair of loafers, a very trusty and very used pair of Doc Marten Adrian tassel loafers. As much as I love them, I always felt like I needed (translation: wanted) a more colorful pair to bring something new to my closet. I became hip to Vinny’s from LA menswear vanguards Brother Brother and kept up with all of their new collections throughout the year. All of their work is stellar, ranging from wardrobe anchoring pennies to party pieces, but the one that held my eye from day one is this two-tone green.
Some feelings are meant to be felt and not put into words. In this case, I just can’t put them into words, but I can tell you this: few feelings compare to putting on a pair of black pants and these babies then walking around like I own everything. Basically, I get to live out this meme. - Emilio
Merrell Winter Moc 2
About a year ago I got my hands on a pair of Merrell’s Jungle Mocs in taupe and my girlfriend said: “Those are the single most ugliest pair of shoes I’ve ever seen you wear and I can’t believe you like them.” Sometime later, Merrell turned my like into a love by taking those shits out the jungle, tossing a rough textured suede over them, and deeming them the “Winter Moc 2”. I’ve been wearing these for the last four months, and they’ve become my go-to slip-ons in the way cool people slide into Birkenstock Bostons (a good shoe, but I always prefer exaggerated styles). - Kevin
Gramicci x thisisneverthat Sacoche
The collaboration of the year that I jumped on w the quickness despite it being the least likely to sell out. I found my go-to hiking bag, really. I put dog treats in this thing and sometimes even a knife (Opinel) when I think about running into a weirdo on the trail who mistakes me for a pure city slicker. - Kevin
G-Shock DW5600SKE-7
I am not a Watch Guy but I am a guy who wears watches, and for me, there is no better watch than the G-Shock DW5600. The DW5600SKE-7, a model number as exciting as reading a barcode out loud, is the typical square-faced G-Shock, except with a blacked out negative display and a transparent band. On the surface, that’s honestly it.
But finding the perfect G-Shock is like finding the right therapist – they just fit you, maaaan. I love transparent acrylic and plastics, and the way this serves as a window for my clamped up armchair is so novel to me that it’s remained the most attractive accessory I own. It’s my daily beater, doubling as plastic wrist candy that conveys to serious Watch Guys that I actually don’t like watches, but instead prefer toys and big baby things. In fact, I’ve never had a single person ask me about this watch, and that’s kinda sick!!!
(Side note: Imagine putting on gloves to handle a G-Shock.)
Anyway, I’ve owned this one for maybe a year and a half now and it’s gotten to that nasty part of clear plastic’s life where human oils have started to break into its surface and taint my band a yellowish hue. Slimy, grimy, gross stuff. But nonetheless, proof of how much sweat I’ve accumulated in this thing and a reminder that I’ve worn it to shit and will continue to wear it until it no longer straps up. - Kevin
Crocs “On the Clock” Clogs
I have something embarrassing to admit. I’ve worked in food service since I was 17 — my first job was at a donut shop — and somehow, until this year, I’d never tried on a pair of clogs. They are synonymous with back of house workers as much as cigarettes and energy drinks, yet it never occurred to me that I could just leave a pair of these at work instead of ruining one or two pairs of shoes every year for the past few years. (Watch The Bear if you don’t understand. It’ll make sense after.)
In the coffee business, there are four types of people: the sneaker wearer, the Doc Martens wearer, the Vans wearer, and the Crocs wearer. I often self-deprecate by referring to working in a coffee shop as being one of the lower rungs in the ladder, a ladder of which restaurant line cooks are top of the food chain, pardon the pun. Those brave soldiers know to be equipped before they go to war; they don’t enter the trenches without their kit of a half box of American Spirits (which they got for $1 from 7-Eleven) and a pair of Crocs.
All of my years working in coffee, I never prepared myself for war. I blindly entered the battlefield, emerged with coffee, floor cleaner, and bleach-stained shoes, and dove back in headfirst without ever equipping myself with the proper rations. Take it from me: own a pair of work shoes. - Emilio
Emilio got better shoes than me